The power for women, as we free ourselves from the oppression of man, lies in a collective remembering. We bring balance and calm to the testosterone of man. We are woman. Collectively we have given birth to everyone here. The ones we label good and the ones we label bad. They have lived inside and have been nourished from our body. We are their creator. It is an interesting phenomenon to think that the credit for life has been given to man. Have we allowed that?
We must stop looking to man to save us. And truly what a pressure on him. He is in absolute overwhelm. This is a mind set ladies. One that we are going to have to tackle. It’s not working out so well. We are being shoved further and further down. Our rights collectively are being taken away… not growing. We are being branded and kept as cattle, we are being raped, murdered and sold into slavery. We are being beaten and our children are being mutilated. He is not saving us. He can’t. He doesn’t know how.
We are going to have to come together and decide that “being taken care of” is not worth the price.
In the midst of all that was wrong in my life, I was given the example of what was necessary to become a woman… a Matriarch! I would like to share my grandmother with you! She was a tiny little woman, but a force of nature. She stood strong and firmly anchored in her beliefs. She couldn’t be swayed… by anyone. She was born in 1913. The depression was in full swing by the time her children were born. She lost one sweet boy to the flu epidemic. Her marriage? She put her foot down on the drinking, but… My mother was the third of the five remaining kids. She was sixteen when my grandfather passed away. When my grandmother remembered this time, in her very gentle way, she just shakes her head. She never remarried. She never even dated. She said that there was no way that she was going to allow another man into her home and trust him with her children. She opened her home and became a foster parent. She raised 52 children not counting her own. She declared that she liked being on her own. She made it work. The money was always there, maybe not for all of the wants but the needs were always met. No one was telling her what to do… or most importantly telling her kids what to do.
So here is this little lady with five kids in the 1960’s making the choice to stand on her own two feet and raise not only her children but 52 other children without “being taken care of.” She didn’t come from money. She put her kids first, determined, and the universe supported her.
I also love to tell the story of her and my father. You see my father was a beautiful, angry, sad little boy, all wrapped up in the adult body of a boxer. His tantrums usually got someone hurt. He was always fighting. He had a “gum on his shoe” relationship with most women, but my little grandma would pull herself up to her full 5’3’’ and point her little finger up at him and say quietly… “Danny sit down.” He respected her.
As I am writing this, I am trying to remember if I ever heard her raise her voice. She stood in absolute integrity and spoke only truth as she knew it to be. She was Fannie Boyer no matter who was in the room.
Integrity is when what you think, and what you do and what you say are in alignment. Only then can you be trusted!
Somewhere along the way, the lens has gotten slightly warped. We have gotten it in our heads that we need a man to survive. When in many cases, we are surviving in spite of them. We are striving to raise our children in spite of them. We go to work with bruises on our faces. We make excuses. Our children have broken bones… He takes care of me. We are allowing them to devour our children, enslave our girls. In many countries our girls are denied an education. Their bodies are mutilated. He takes care of me…
This mind shift is a shift from fear to awareness. It is an awakening. I envision a woman rising as if from a long dark sleep. She stands looks around and instantly understands how her presence and participation has been missed. Her heart swells at the pain and suffering… the devastation. She aches at the loneliness of our children. She sees the world as it is… Humans lonely and afraid. Their sole purpose is survival. It has been a very long time since the earth has had a mother. As she steps forward, she begins to realize she is not alone. Women are waking up across the planet. They are joining together… arm in arm… in support of one another! Change happens.
Fear is an idea. Nothing more. The shift comes in replacing fear with awareness. Let’s compare to the type of awareness it takes to drive a car. We enter the game of driving with full awareness. We understand that we have no control over the other drivers. We understand that there is potential for a driver of another car to be impaired in some way or making poor choices. Yet we do it every day. We do it without fear. We gladly teach our kids to do it. We move out into traffic aware, our antenna is up. We hone in on all incoming information. We are aware of the space around us, alert to any encroachment into our personal space. We are observant to the actions of the other vehicles yet their actions are not taken personally. Our attention and focus is in the present moment… otherwise bad things happen. Awareness extends our reaction time.
What if we took the same model of awareness and turned it toward our interactions with people? We are approaching each interaction in the moment. There is no prepared story. We are trusting that things will be okay but aware and ready to take action if action is required. You are present and alert to intent and motive… theirs and yours! You are aware of your personal space. You stand strong in what is acceptable and comfortable in relation to what touches or goes inside of your body. You are an entity in and of itself.
Those of us with privilege are required to go inside and gather up what you know and become a warrior for those who are trapped in the snares of government and religions. For some of us, the trappings of man are an idea for others it is all too real. They are trapped not only in their homes but in their cities, in their countries.
I encountered a Buddhist tradition on one of my journeys that became a powerful tool for me. The conversation was around archetypes. The activity was to choose to be infused with the energies or an attribute given to a god or goddess that you would like to grow or nurture in yourself. In your research allow yourself to be guided by your attention. Which ones suck you in and why? In a sense, let them choose you. Then after entering into a light meditative state, I like to do it at the beginning, after I get settled in, and request to be infused with the power or attributes of the goddesses or gods of your choice. We can look to the power of the animals as well. I mingle the two myself. Say I want to be infused with the strength, courage and dignity of the lioness. I am infused with the loyalty, connectedness, selfless service and trust in oneself of the elephant. Choose three and work with them daily. I have created a list of goddesses and spirit animals accompanied by their attributes to get you started. You can access it by signing up for our email list and downloading it from the confirmation page.