Here’s a really big one, especially for the ladies out there. Nice is different than kind!
Why do we say yes when we really want to say no?
Not that this isn’t a common thing for all humans, but I think it’s very ingrained in woman to be accommodating, especially to man.
I hear it over and over again, women saying, yeah, I, I had sex with him last night. I really didn’t want to. Why did you? Oh, well I knew he wanted it so bad and I didn’t want to disappoint him. I felt bad.
OR… I went out with this guy the other day. I didn’t want to say yes but I didn’t want his feelings to be hurt. Or I stayed married to this man because he said he was gonna hurt himself. If I left.
We can’t do this guys.
Do you understand that saying yes when you really want to say no, it’s truly a lie and lies are never good for anyone, right? Because you are painting a picture for this individual that is not based in truth and what you’re giving you is a lack of importance. You are putting your wants and needs behind the needs of another.
YOU are IMPORTANT!
Nice is different than kind!
There’s a huge difference between being nice and being kind right. Being nice is doing something that we think we should do. Nine times out of 10 our thought words and actions are not in alignment.
We have regret around it.
We feel sacrifice around it.
Martyrdom is ours
Nice acts. They haunt us because they’re a lie. It’s like feeding somebody only the icing off of a cake and never getting into the cake.
We have to know that.
Kindness, on the other hand, most often it passes by.
We don’t even understand that we did anything extraordinary.
We just gave.
Regret is not ours.
We don’t feel sacrifice.
We don’t feel any sort of remorse or lack or martyrdom.
Nice is different than Kind!
As we move forward into wholeness and integrity, our goal is what we think, what we say and what we do come into alignment.
I know it feels uncomfortable, especially in the beginning, but coming into integrity and choosing what you want , is an exercise.
We all know you’re not making this choice to harm anyone.
This is about you and what you deserve. If you don’t respect your wants and needs how would can you expect anyone else to approach you with that honor.
I like to think of this kind of like, I feel about mom energy. We can give people what they want, or we can give people what they need. And most often what they need and what they want are two different things.
If somebody wants you and you’re not in alignment with that, how is that good for anyone? It’s not good for them. It’s not good for you. So step into that, it’s never a good choice.
It’s never a right minded choice to say yes, when we want to say no.
It is your time to choose… Who you are, why you’re here, what is acceptable for YOU! ,
What do YOU want? What do YOU need.
You deserve that. And no, one’s going to give that to you until, you know.
Hop in and take a twirl around my new program Today I Choose! You will be blown away by the power packed into this daily 7 minute time investment. That’s right! Get up laugh, dance and twirl around for 7 minutes each morning as you work your way through these power packed 25 audio. Actively take back your right to choose what you want for your tomorrow.
let’s take a look at these age old questions… Who am I? And Why am I here?… in a new and different way!.
In our lack of responsibility collectively, we have been huddling in fear under a collective slavery.
We forgot who we are!
We have been shying away from taking our place and finding permission to release our belief in what we have been told.
Who am I?
Anything I can do you can do and more…
You are a Spiritual… Magical being who has chosen to walk this earth as a human. To bring all that is possible down to this earth.
To be in the world and not of it.
Not to rise away and float aimlessly caught in the many fears of what is claimed as Spirit.
Spirit is simple. Spirit is childlike. Fear is fear. No mater what level of existence it seeps in.
Universal law rings true. It knows no time… no space.
Our religions have made light of our charge… Anything I can do you can do and more… You can move mountains.
Instead of Gods walking the earth we have been lulled into unconscious slavery.
For you to become what you are intended you have to first understand what is possible, what we have had glimpses of, and how this amazing spaceship of a system operates. And what you are ultimately capable of.
As above so below.
So what ever is here is a replica of what extends out and vise versa.
We as humans have been trying to replicate what is natural through melena.
What am I?
The computer works hard to replicate the way the human system operates. And now they are getting close to replicating human likeness on many levels.
You are gifted in your humanness with the most amazing operating system. You have come here with everything you need.
We just forgot!
As above so below!
The sea of information that we call the internet is a small replica of what we call the creator… the Universe… God.
A sea of amazing information.
Could it be possible that this same sea of information houses all forms of information.
Where you put your attention, energy flows into creation as search for answers to those primal questions.
Who am I? And Why am I here?
In many texts throughout time this energy has been compared to water. What is the base component for all that is here?
Water in its amazing ambivalence can nourish and support life and it can take it away.
In reference to our purpose with the concept of the computer, I like to think of electricity it can bring light or it can catch fire to all you love. The results are in how you choose to interact with it and with what level of respect.
Back to the internet. We can be enriched by the vast amount of information or we can find out in detail the best most efficient way to commit murder or violate children.
It is all there. You are in control of what you choose to poke your nose in.
It’s the same.
If you are going to be in constant fear around demons, you will have them poking around. Your fascination of angels, you will be blessed with seeing them everywhere and feel grace and blessings with each sighting. If fairies make you smile you can make that your passion and you will find fairies.
Cords and persecution. It’s the game taking the information that has the scales tipping heavy and creating a story. Fear is present.
It is all you! And what you give your attention.
The game… The matrix can take one fearful story and make it your world in 2.2.
It requires vigilance over your mind… Depersonalize yourself from the game.
If blame, Guilt or fear… In any of their many forms are present you are being played.
Clarity is of the essence.
Just like google if you put in a sloppy question you are going to get a mess of results that have little to do with what you really want or need.
Here’s the catch. You could take one of those sloppy responses as your truth. That information could become your rules for life.
Are they true? Not necessarily.
Are you treating it as though it were true? Yes!
Are those very different things? Yes.
Why am I here?
To be in the world and not of it. To pull the light of justice and balance… of true love to the planet. To obliterate suffering.
This truth is the essence of our goal.
You chose to come here.
For this. To help in the shift that is imperative for our world to survive. A shift from upside down to rightmindedness.
You came here as a spiritual being to be human in all of its glory.
We have suffered greatly living quietly in this upside-down world.
But you are here today on purpose with a purpose.
This is the moment we have been waiting for.
There is access… NOW!
These simple exercises are the first steps in understanding what you are capable of, what you are already doing and how to move from reaction into choice.
See you on the other side of the eye of the needle!
Now that you are comfortable in your body Its time to activate the Wisdom Circuit.
The wisdom circuit gives us access to our instant knowingness.
Many of us, in response to the circumstances in our environment, we unwittingly turned it off when we were children.
In many cases, it was causing more pain knowing and being denied or seeing and not being heard than not knowing at all.
I don’t know about you but ur guts yelled out truths and we could not listen… We were in no position to challenge what was our normal… So we dismantled it.
Are you one of the ones who spent your lives stuck in your left brain cut off from your creativity and joy, or do you operate from your hearts cut off from our knowingness and wisdom leaving us trusting when it is not wise.
So often I here, but I love him… I see who he can become… If I just love him enough.
We have our intuition, our analytical and creative thought and our gut knowingness turned off.
It is seldom in our best interest to make choices based on information from one source.
This is why we feel we can’t trust ourselves or our decisions.
We must find balance and justice in our approach to life and that begins with understanding and activating the wisdom circuit.
After bringing people into the corpus callosum for years neuroscience is finding it to be the control room of our brain.
I see is it as the connector of information.
As we settle ourselves into our control room… the corpus callosum.
The corpus callosum is the passageway between left and right brain.
For those that have experienced continual trauma the passage way becomes narrow and thick.
As we enter our bodies through the crown of our head and rest into the corpus collasum. We allow ourselves to notice where we lean. Are you left brain or right brain heavy?
You notice and find balance right in the center of that passage way.
Stretch it out. And much like a level we allow that bubble find balance or justice.
As we draw the energy that rides behind the eyes back to connect into the corpus callosum as well.
With the balance we see the circuit connect from corpus out to the left brain. From corpus out to the right brain. Information and energy is received from the third eye into the corpus callosum as well.
Creating a triangle from third eye back, to left brain, right brain, with a line down the center connecting the third eye in directly to the corpus callosum.
Interesting enough what I see resembles an ancient symbol of the triangle with the third eye at the top. It is just missing the direct connection back from the apex of the triangle… The third eye to the control room.
The next stop in connecting The Wisdom Circuit is the heart.
Science says that we have brain cells in our hearts… Thinking cells.
We need to activate them.
From your seat in your control room we drop down into our hearts. We watch all of those brain cells in your heart lights up as the circuit connects from corpus callosum to heart.
As we drop down into our gut we witness all the braincells in your gut light up as the circuit connects from activated heart to gut.
When the wisdom circuit is connected we are gathering information from all layers of our being. This is where we access those knowings that rise up from our belly forming clear, concise information. No deciphering necessary.
When we are gaining access to information and it feels all complicated and confusing you know that there is intellect or ego involvement. Humans love to complicate things. It makes us feel smart.
Spirit is Simple… Spirit is Childlike.
So play with this. See it.
Our brains love to measure so measure your change. Always measure and celebrate even the smallest changes.
Where attention goes energy follows. What we want to grow we measure.
What feels knew and different?
How is my response to the world changing in the coming days?
Now I know you, just like I did, want to put all of this trauma and suffering away for good… Right.
You know, our world’s going to change when we come into integrity and into wholeness individually, right? That’s the only way it’s going to spread out.
So first I want to address the question of trauma and the level of it’s affects? Is mine bad enough?
We have a tendency to minimize our experiences and compare them to somebody that had dire experiences. I know for myself, I grew up with a Grandmother who had a house full of foster children at all times, I would talk away what was happening to me. As I grew older I would talk myself into believing that nothing that happened was bad enough to have caused me to go completely sideways and in so many ways.
What’s true is your personal level of sensitivity has a lot to do with the impact. Just like how one germ affects people in different ways depending on the strength of their immune systems.
When we start making choices out of fear versus curiosity, life is going to take a completely different trajectory, right? So I’d like for us to just truly be able to step in and say, yeah, that happened. It isn’t about blame and isn’t about what somebody should have done. It’s about how you embodied that experience and what words were embedded in your programming and that you use every day to describe your experiences, to describe yourself, to describe the people around you. That’s what’s important now.
How does trauma affect our timeline?
That’s something we don’t really think about. We think about how it affects us, but how does it affect time?
So we’ve got this young child, say maybe five or six. Let’s be true he hasn’t had his little body for that long. And suddenly he’s faced with a sexual experience, which is way more advanced than his brain has the capabilities of dealing with such a young age. This child has no words. He has no framework to analyze his situation.
So what’s he going to do?
He’s going to get out!
It’s much like if I were going to reach out my hand and touch a hot burner, what am I going to do? Pull back. It’s not just happening to his fingers. It’s happening to his body. I’ve got to get out of here. I’m in danger. So he backs out. That’s dissociation. Or an out of body experience.
We tend to relegate the out of body experiences to the grownups, but the kids do it very easily. There are no thoughts around not being able to.
They’re just, it’s a reaction. This is awful. The core of my being is being attacked. I’m going to get away from the pain.
When we look at how trauma might affect our timeline we have to think about what’s he going to do next?
So this little super hero kid is looking down on this infectious moment and goes, Oh my gosh, what am I going to do with that? How am I possibly going to get up tomorrow sit at the breakfast table with these human beings that I thought right were keeping me safe and protected. He is going to encapsulate it. He’s going to tie that stretch of time off in a loop, in a time loop, or a cyst, on his timeline right.
With this moment of time encapsulated and not in the flow with rest of his timeline it is removed from his memories until he’s triggered into remembering. And then? It seems to be all he can see. That doesn’t mean that that information is not buried in the psyche somewhere hauntingly. This is what the world calls traumatic amnesia. How many of us remember trauma in our 40’s and 50’s?
We also have to understand that this astral body, this energetic version of the physical body that rose out of his little body has molecules. And… if you’re encapsulating this moment, you’re also encapsulating, a version of you in there too. Right.
When we talk fragmentation in a very literal, practical way, the astral body has fragmented and left enough life force in his body he left behind for it to continue on. Taking the bulk of the astral body on to his next destination.
We know that we’re offered six alternate timelines, every moment, which is 90 seconds approximately. That being said in that next moment, the child hops over a few frames. He hops into reality of new choices. Not so different he can’t assimilate but lets take door number 3…
I call that reality hopping.
Now the deal is what’s going on over here in this new timeline is similar but different. Soon the child starts feeling like they don’t fit in. That nothing’s quite what it seems, things, aren’t how he remembered him. Right. And it almost feels like, Oh, I didn’t get the script for this moment. These people aren’t hearing me or understanding me. He begins the journey into alien and separateness, out of place.
What if truly, he is?
So these are the quantum actions that are responsible for what we call today, PTSD. This amazing skill skill responsible for trapping these moments in time brilliant. The only hiccup is that those versions of ourselves keep drawing us back… Wanting us to remember.
They have been trapped reliving your worst experiences like groundhog day.
The quantum actions that this child was able to take, the magic at his disposal… He is a little superhero. Grown ups spend years trying to learn this stuff.
The super cool thing is that these quantum actions can be duplicated… You already know how to do it. You just need to remember how.
These same quantum actions can be initiated on purpose and these loops can be dismantled. Which means PTSD can and does have a remedy.
You are not mentally ill. You’re not crazy. You are a superhero. It does have a remedy and life can start forward and upward instead of sideways!
I know being out there is tempting but the game’s played here. We chose to be human and we have to learn to play the game here.
Hop on a 30 minute Clarity call with me, truly, I would love to talk to you and it’s free. And let’s see what we can do for you because truly, I believe in my core that the world is going to change with each and every one of us, it’s not going to change by the government. It’s not going to change by people praying. It is going to change by us taking the action necessary to change ourSelves.
This concept, in many different forms, has been rolling around my mind for many years as I was rising out of the suffering and anger and angst and pain and confusion of my childhood traumas and what the matrix or the game or the story did with that.
As I got older and spoke about my experiences, and I put more words around them, I began to understand there are many levels to the meaning of justice. And I think our world has really settled into the most primal space… where justice is punishment.
I don’t believe that to be efficient. I don’t believe that to be what was intended.
The symbol for justice is scales. And what do we want from a scale, but balance right.
Justice is balance.
We are talking balance on all levels of existence, right? Beginning right here with us. Deepak Chopra asked me one time and I’ll tell you what, I was infuriated, he asked me how long it had been since I was last physically hurt.
I said, I was 17. He said, so who was responsible for all those years from 17 to today?
Justice starts right here with personal responsibility.
Being aware that any time that we’re pointing a finger of blame. Any time we are pointing a finger of blame, we are denying the personal responsibility of making or not making our choices.
Science says we are given 6 alternate tendril timelines every moment each containing a choice. A choice creates motion or momentum.
So when have we ever found it to be true that another human is going to play your game in your best interest without running it through the filter of effects the choice will have on them Selves.
This is rare for sure…
So justice Is a requirement. It is the word of the day on every level, right? Black and white male, female, Democrat, Republican, haves have nots… the call is there ranging from the collective to the nucleus of our families.
We have got to find a place of justice or balance, right?
Down to the most primal… Who do I trust? Where do I put my allegiance?
I call this place a space of right mindedness.
Because us being here, is us choosing to play this game.
I like to think of the movie the Hunger Games. Games are about you progressing from start to finish. Games come with choices to make and circumstances to get though. While helping people along the way is important and intended you are still playing the game. The point of the game is still to get from here to there.
The object is to be in the world and not of it.
Being able to stay right minded… Solution based and not lulled or affected in anyway by the chaos or the destructive nature of what is happening out there.
How amazing would that be to be in the world and not of it?
The game is played here on all 5 levels of being… Spiritually, Physically, Emotionally, Behaviorally and Mentally.
Justice begins with you. A spiritual being choosing to be human is different than a human having a spiritual experience.
A human is Spiritually, Physically, Emotionally, Behaviorally and Mentally all at the same time. HERE!
I love questions. So please, please leave your questions, in the comments and I will speak directly to you.
I think that for us to walk forward in the world in a new and different way, we have to start really picking apart the upside down. As we begin to question all we believe to be true we find our truth and that’s what these few minutes are about… A shift in thought.
I would like to share with you the link to put to book your 30 minute free call. I’d love to talk to you. I’d love to see what we can do to create activation in your life, right here… right now… to get you moving into action, be that moving from a place of crisis, with PTSD or a place of stuck, or a place of boredom, a place of complacency, any of those places. If we are occupying any of these energies we are not doing what we came here to do, right? So I’d love to have a conversation. And as I said, that link will be in in the comments. And I hope to see you back here tomorrow.
In an attempt to make someone hear me I said to my family… How about on my way into town I stop by the prison and pick up a child molester and bring them to family thanksgiving. Of course there was outrage!
What about forgiveness? He never did anything to you really? Right? He didn’t penetrate you Right? What about turning the other cheek?
Nothing changed though. There was a child molester at our table every year.
He was nice to me.
To everyone out there whose family is going through this turmoil… Ted Bundy was nice to a lot of people.
Just because he was nice to you does not negate the fact that he murdered all of those women.
Nice is like the icing on a cake. It’s often masking the flaws in the cake.
You were duped.
My protest of the friendly involvement of my family with the uncle that molested me was met with… He didn’t do that to me. I don’t want to loose the rest of his family. What he did to you wasn’t that bad. Right?
What is that? Either I don’t believe you or it doesn’t matter to me.
The blind lopsided alliance perpetuates abuse!!!
When we are cutting the victim out of the family and retaining the abuser what message does that deliver?
Now the craziest part is for many the abuse can be wide out in the open. Why can’t you just get over it? Can’t you just move on now?
Here is what I’d like to say to this… If a woman was raped by a stranger would we be telling her to get over it? Would we be sweeping it under the rug and inviting her rapist to hang out? Is his friendship more important than the damage that he caused to someone you claim to love?
OR would we honor her? In real life it seems everyone would be terrified to have this man around our other family members?
In cases of sexual trauma wouldn’t it make sense to be worried about all of the other children that this human would come in contact with?
Not so often. In many cases the families blind spot leaves the rest of the worlds children at risk.
Often instead the focus is on the ideal of the ruination of a “good man’s name”.
This way of thinking has got to change!
The after effects of ongoing familial loyalty to the abuser perpetuates the abuse and sometimes outweighs the actual affects of the trauma.
I see it day in and day out.
How do you rectify the reality of your mom or your dad telling you that your experiences were completely unimportant?
Can you imagine knowing that what someone did to you carries less weight than the potential consequences that will come to the abuser? And I’m not talking legal – I’m talking life, family exile or word getting out in the community…
The support of family supercharges recovery. To know that you have a tribe that supports you and sends the abuser into exile instead and holds you close. What a gift.
Familial support goes a long way in ones ability to move out of the patterns of suffering!
We learn in kindergarten that behaviors have consequences.
This knowledge is in big part what shapes our growth and our ability to make wiser choices.
We know this. Yet the abuser most often experiences very little in the line of consequences. So what does he do but move on to the next victim?
Oh, that’s just Uncle Clarence steer clear of him… with a chuckle.
Rewarded behaviors continue. That’s human nature.
In reality, the man holding court for her abuser and giving up his son’s family is causing abuse himSelf.
This lopsided familial loyalty to the abuser traps the victim in a very twisted mind game. Self doubt begins to arise. Either she down plays what this person did to her or she stands alone against all that she knows and loves.
Not only is the woman dealing with the idea that her dad nor her father-in-law’s allegiance is with her AND on a primal level she’s realizing that neither of them REALLY find a problem with what her brother did to her.
For this woman, all ideas of family have exploded AND she is now feeling responsible for the crumble of her husband’s family as well.
Let’s send big praise out to the son for standing by his wife…
NO MATTER WHAT THAT LOOKS LIKE!
We need more people to cross the line into right mindedness.