Hi, I’m Cherie and we are winding up a two-part series on PTSD from the Outside. This is for the lovers, the parents, the children and the friends of someone who is or has been a victim of trauma. Last week we talked about the whys and the behaviors this week I want to talk about the how’s.
So, what is PTSD in a nutshell?
PTSD and dissociation go hand in hand, you can’t have PTSD without dissociating. Very simply Dissociation is the act of leaving your body and the ability to astral travel, innately.
What is astral travel? The ability to separate one’s soul from the physical body. The soul can hover and observe their environment, or travel across the globe or traverse spans of time. Those practicing astral travel are extremely aware of leaving their body… it is a choice. As well as the awareness around coming back home to this body.
Now see… there lies the problem. There is no awareness around leaving and no process for coming home.
Dissociation is a reaction, and astral travel is a choice.
PTSD is the cumulative result of what she did while she was out. Traversing time and space.
This may sound a little sy-fy but so does life in your house, sometimes right?
For an example, let’s use a little girl, say 6. Daddy comes into her room late one night. Everyone’s sleeping. He’s looming over her. He reaches down, kisses her, which should be okay, but it feels different this time, she feels afraid. And then he touches her. Boom she’s gone. She gets out of her body as fast as she can. Some people have memories of watching from above for a few minutes but then nothing.
So, what happens in the nothing? There is no research on what happens when a person dissociates.
We’re only attached to the laws of nature when we’re here, in our bodies.
Now, back to the little girl, there’s no programming to process what is happening, she is out of her body because this scene has threatened to blow her circuits. So, she encapsulates it, just like your body encapsulates infection creating a cyst. So, she creates a cyst on her timeline. Now we’re gonna get back to it, but there are molecules, her molecules, left behind. Now this cyst on her timeline, this frozen moment in time, is A time loop.
A time loop is a phenomenon when some periods of time are repeated and re-experienced. The person trapped in a time loop is trying to get out. They are trying to break the cycle. Sound familiar?
Now she is trapped there forever to live exactly what she was trying to get away from. That version of her wants out. And at any opportunity, she, the version trapped in the loop, is going to snag her. Pull her back. So that she can remember. And release her. She wants to come home. I also want to interject here that the version that is trapped there is real. We aren’t talking memory here. We’re talking a severing. A fragmentation. We are talking molecules, her molecules, dispersed through time.
Here is an example: In the lore of ghosts, spirits or hauntings. Say a hotel has an experience where certain events play out at a certain time of day. It’s like they’re superimposed over the top of whatever is happening. It’s not interacting with you and you can’t interact with it. This is not a haunting. You are witnessing someone’s forgotten loop.
Now… That’s not all. So she tied off the yuck. She can’t go back there. What does she do now? We know science says that every possibility for every moment is happening all at the same time. Each outcome is just ever so slightly different. So she hops over a few frames to an outcome she can bear. I call it Reality Hopping.
Now It would seem, cool she was able to start over, but here’s the catch, she’s starting over without the information to make a new choice. She knows something bad happened, she remembers the beginning and the end. But something feels off. But she doesn’t know what.
I can actually remember coming down into being in my room after a beating. I must have been told to stay in there because I am kneeling with my knees on the threshold. I was aware enough to know that when I come down I need to try to remember so that I can tell someone. I remember trying so hard to hold on but much like a dream within minutes it faded away and all that was left was a feeling of dread like I was forgetting something really important.
So all of this sounds pretty super heroish, but here’s the catch? She starts this new life knowing fear. A fear strong enough to create that. And nowhere to put it. Everyone here has a different story. She feels isolated. Lonely. Wary. She feels like she doesn’t belong. Is she adopted? Is she an alien?
And that’s not all, this happens over and over again until it becomes her way of being. Her body is like a puppet. She watches her life play out with very little attachment to it.
So we have this loop. We tied it off because it was infectious. Anger, shame guilt, things we don’t know. The version of her trapped there is in a whirl. What happens when molecules are in a whirl. Eventually, they explode. Got your attention yet? She’s trying.
Back to these molecules, we only have so many. Our essence is claimed to weigh 21 grams. Controversial, I know. But the number isn’t what matters, what does with weight comes molecules.
Hers are scattered throughout time.
Now the result as time goes on is like a snagged piece of fabric with say12 pulls. Because of the loops, the fabric is all bunched up. There is very little space between today and 40 years ago. It’s a short hop. And once we snag something we are always snagging it.
Secondly, let’s look at this little girls timeline and how far she is standing today from her trajectory at birth.
She is living in numerous realities. Loops all over her timeline and from the age six on has been making choices out of a program that is wary and knows fear. She knows suspicion. She has to watch everybody. Trust? How can she trust you she can’t trust herself. She doesn’t know what’s real. Real is whatever reality she is in at the moment.
What she needs is to gather herself back up. “I want to find me” is usually one of the first things people say to me. I need to find me. In an incognito yet fundamental way, she knows. Most say they loop. That’s their words. Reality hop? Oh yeah, all of the time. Time travel um yeah!
Well, that’s how we fix it. They do it. They already know how. Its fast its easy. It’s not about the pain. It’s not about the suffering. It’s about coming home.
The really super cool thing after the first couple of integrations she will begin to remember to laugh, to play… Maybe even crave an ice cream cone. Because trapped with the yuck is her innocence.
As says the master, Gandhi. Happiness comes when what you think what you say and what you do are in alignment. That’s integrity. That’s when she can trust herself and you.
So if someone you love is suffering reach out. Let’s set up a call and see if my Finding Me Integration Program feels right. In 90 days life will be different. We can clean up her timeline. Integrate the information and bring all of her pieces back to this time this space. She will have tools and practices to utilize to keep her here. Very quickly life turns from reaction to choice. 90 days… What have you got to lose? You can schedule a complimentary consultation at cheriedoyen.com/schedule-appointment.