So many of us have spent our lives running. Inside and out. Our lives are consumed with just staying ahead of that thing that has been chasing us. It has been so long we aren’t even really sure what it is. Those childhood monsters are just as real today. We are living our lives as if those horrible things happened yesterday.
Deepak Chopra once said to me, “Suffering is a choice.” I replied rather puffed up… I did not choose what happened to me as a child. I didn’t choose for those men to touch me sexually. I didn’t choose to be beaten. A tear rolled down my face. He replied gently, “No, but you are choosing how you are reacting today. How long has it been since you were beaten?”
It hit me like a ton of bricks. I was sixteen when I finally had the courage to stand up to my father. I was sixteen when I declared that I was going to the police and yelling to the world all I knew to be true if anyone ever touched me again. I was forty-eight at the time of this conversation. I spent 32 years reliving the emotion of those experiences as if they had happened yesterday. I was horrified. What a waste!
It doesn’t have to be this way.
Let’s take a look at how this pattern keeps churning. First by using the analogy of the runner. As a runner it is unwise to run in one direction while looking in another. When running we look directly in front of us usually at the ground. Our sight is focused on where to lay down our next foot. We have a very narrow laser pointed view of our route. Things whiz by in the peripheral view, our experience alters little. We could be encountering the same pothole at the same time every Wednesday and we wouldn’t notice. We don’t have the capacity to register patterns. The connections between our childhood stuff and our reoccurring adult stuff slides past us easily. Fear has usurped any capacity to create a Road Map for future trips or for those who come after us.
Outwardly, we have filled our time with so many activities we don’t have time to breathe… running on the outside. Inwardly, with all of the movement, we have little time to think. Running on the inside. Even entertaining the idea to stop is horrifying. Because we know that if we stop, we have to face that big horrifying thing that has been chasing us. It has been so long that we haven’t looked back in years. We aren’t even sure what it is anymore. We are hitting circumstance after circumstance… they feel vaguely familiar.
Visualize the insides of an electrical wire. With the plastic coating stripped away we are left with, too many to count, individual wires who come together to create the circuit which allows the electricity to run through. It can work, albeit less efficiently, with a few of the wires frayed and snapped– but there comes a point when the connection cannot be made.
I want you to create a space. The idea around creating this space is that you begin to lay down energy. Your body, mind, and spirit will know exactly what you wish to happen when you enter. Much like we know about sleep. We know that for best results with sleep, we need to be aware what energy or activities you bring to that space.
You are creating the space to meet you, a womb so to speak. Think about that. Decorate it. Bring things into the space that make you smile. Bring in colors that make you feel safe and comfortable. For some this may be a blend of spiritual evoking pieces for others nature… a vase of flowers or crystals. Scents to calm… lavender, patchouli and vanilla are a few to have around. Again, this isn’t about anyone but you and God. All comes through Him, so what you like, whatever makes you smile, comes back around in the end. We are moving out of structure here. There are no walls, no fences, just possibilities.
The creation of the space is putting energy in motion. Action brings action. Give yourself 30 minutes in the morning and 30 minutes in the evening in your newly created space.
Pick a place in your home and write about what you want to do with it. Spend time thinking through what you have and want to bring into your space. As we put it together in our minds, we are declaring words around it and when you get home begin with action by entering the space you have chosen and gather up a few things to set things in motion.
I like to have an outdoor space as well. Energetically, the only thing out of sync in nature is you. Take a walk by yourself… find a spot under a tree. Put your phone away and be there.
This is a judge free zone. We don’t judge what we feel here. We don’t judge what we see here. There is no right way to be here. Where you are today is a culmination of your past experiences. Where you are tomorrow is your choice.
Quantum physics says that every possibility for each moment is happening all at once. Much like a movie reel. Comprised of many different stills, moving so fast that we have the illusion of fluidity. The trick is learning to look somewhere different. Your head turned in a slight different direction gives access to new information and likewise opens the door to a different outcome.
Daily Affirmation – Who am I!
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